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Useful

There are times when I feel like my own crap is just too much. My mind is too analytical, my obsessive nature clings to too many thoughts, my relationship with the Lord is too mucked up with fear and anxiety to be of any use to others.

And then I have mornings like I had today, when I meet with a student with a mind just like mine, and my experiences actually become useful. The ways I have been comforted by Grace become a means for me to comfort another. My junk is no longer junk; it is a redeemed treasure, an experience that lets another know that they are not alone, that not only have I been in the same spot, but the Lord has also been there with me. And he is right there with her, just like he was (and is) with me. And he has redeemed my moments, my anxieties, my fears and turned them into a testimony of His grace.

I am thankful today for the quaint little town of Sierra Madre, hidden next to the Mountains, removed from the graffiti and grime of Los Angeles. I'm thankful for a park bench next to a Starbucks and a girl named Natalie who is working through the stuff of faith* and, though it feels like she is stuck, is moving beautifully through her wreckage as she grapples for truth and grace.

Thank you, Jesus, for using us when we feel useless, for giving us purpose when we feel purposeless, for being our hope when we feel hopeless.

*the "stuff of faith" was coined by my dear friend Stephanie Hough and has been my favorite phrase of late thanks to a coffee date with her a few weeks back :)

Comments

  1. StephanieJune 2, 2011 at 2:24 PM

    I really, really like this post. It is so true and hopeful, and in its own way, happy. (And thanks for the shout out too! I'm so glad we were able to get coffee together. I love talking to you - wish we could do it much, much more often!)

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